How to Coach a Pirate: Qualitative Survey Results

These are the qualitative responses to my survey on ‘How to Coach a Pirate’ which I wrote for the completion of my coaching qualification with Meyler Campbell. The rest of the results can be found here, and the essay itself can be found here.

Please do not quote from these results without attribution.

“Founders are notorious for lacking self-awareness, and many are uncoachable. Only the most mature ones can evolve to be the leader they need to be.”

“They often have an insatiable appetite for learning so can be agile in the moment (at any moment); have an unwavering vision; are passionate, ambitious, seek out feedforward and others views, love a sounding board, and, are laser focused on results. They love to be first, pioneering, experimental, constantly strengthening their curiosity muscle. They build strong strategic networks and a credible, well qualified coach/advisor/mentor will form part of that network that has real net worth for them as they work to realise their vision. To be coachable, in Meyler Campbell terms we would say they have a desire to learn and change, are credible in their own right, are self-motivated and are more or less sane! Need to be cautious with the latter so as to be inclusive and not offensive to those more sensitive to such terms.”

“I think there is a BIG difference on these questions between (i) founders disrupting a sector and (ii) CEOs leading a transformation. The former are generally non-self-aware and unwilling to listen. This is a strength until it's not (cue story after story about Founder transitions). The latter are more willing to listen, have had richer experiences, and have learned from others who have mentored them.”

“I could not answer either way so have a 5. Too many different types.”

“Many disruptive leaders are smart executives who ultimately know what they are doing, they just choose to ignore certain behaviours to justify achieving results. They will be lower on the spectrum though as the adrenaline of risk vs reward takes over. I believe they are coachable as a great coach can get them to take a beat and consider other solutions that could have had the same or bigger impact without the carnage. I also believe that there are very effective tools that, properly delivered, can offer rounded feedback - such as 360.”

“I think it varies between individuals, which is why I gave both an 'average score' of 5. For some part of their disruptive quality is an agility in taking on board new thinking, including insights into themselves. They may see coaching as a sounding board for their innovative thinking and a way to support it and explore new possibilities, in which case they'd be eminently coachable. Others may suffer from hubris and as an extension of that, not believe they have anything to learn from anyone, including a coach. If someone absolutely doesn't want coaching, doesn't believe it has anything to offer them and lacks even a chink of open-mindedness towards it my sense is they'd be fairly uncoachable, at least in any meaningful way.”

“I think they vary enormously on both questions, really - I put 5 in each case because some are and some aren't in each case. To take my son's founder as an example, it's a startup that's going well, profitable, now up to 100 people, but he (founder) has articulated a set of values that no one pays any attention to because they bear no relation to the way he personally behaves with his people: rude, sexist, unempathetic, abrasive. It's his second startup, he's making a pile of money out of it, and has very little apparent interest in changing. Conversely previous startup founders I've worked with would be very coachable, very keen to do the best for their people and company.”

“Both questions were hard as each person is unique. My view is that they are generally aware of how good they are (less so their blind spots) however they generally don't think they need help. Hence the gap.”

“Disruptive leaders in my experience are hyper self aware, albeit may purposefully not appear so. I think they are coachable because they relish new ideas, and indeed help as they are invariably breaking tricky new ground.”

“They may or may not have awareness of their impact. The issue is whether they actually care about it and whether the have the emotional regulation to change their behaviours.”

"Most I’ve met, if they were self-aware, wouldn’t be the creative genius that they are - they would be constrained by reality”

“I think it depends on what they want to be coached on"

“Perhaps being driven by purpose can blinker your perspective.”

"Based on my experience of founders. They often don’t have people around them that can give them candid advice.”

“Most people are coachable."

“Think they are typically self aware but unrepentant. That inflexibility could be a barrier to the coaching being effective”

“It’s possible that truly disruptive leaders, Musk, Jobs etc are on a spectrum somewhere … and disruptive leaders also have a more than average quotient of self-belief.”

“They lack selfawsreness as they are not interested in the human dimension of their leadership and merely focus on results. They may be open to coach but this will stay om the surface as the are not willing to look deeper about themself, they tend to consider that others that are impacted by their behaviours are simple weak.”

“The lack of self awareness of disruptive leaders I’ve worked with, also has made them successful, thus confirming them they are doing the right thing. Strong investors, respected board members (particularly chairperson) and trusted advisors may mitigate the downside to a large extent. Within that context, a respected coach/mentor might be effective.”

“They are coachable as long we can raise awareness.”

“Self conviction and poor listening.”

“To my mind disruptive leaders have to 'believe' in their analysis and solutions to a point that often times excludes nuance or data the challenges. Self awareness entails 'stepping out of yourself' and holding on less tightly to your pre-conceptions.”

“In my experience, disruptive leaders receive a lot of feedback about how their leadership and mamangement style impacts others. I find that they are relatively aware of their achilles heal (as well as strengths), but still maintain a belief that their way is the right way. However, they can be open to input on how to improve their effectiveness - if phrased in a way that could resonate, coaching could be part of that process.”

“They are a type of personality that rewards itself by their way or the highway thinking - whether it is dopamine to the brain, or just how they are wired. They often think everyone else is an idiot - all evidence to the contrary. Some will be coachable and some just won't. Doesn't matter who that coach is - they just have unwavering self confidence they know best. There will defo be coachable ones though - who want to learn to balance that innate self belief and vision with commercial reality - like how do they access money.”

“There is potential for lack of self awareness where it distracts from their clarity and drive.”

"Uncoachable- lack time, assume this will take them away from their work/commitments instead of improving them. Assume that coaching is for when something is wrong, not about their next upgrade of leadership. So unless something is obviously wrong, they wont see out a coach.”

“They can be coachable as more folks have coaches so they want to be like other successful people they admire.They lack self awareness as usually they've been pretty successful up until now in most areas of their life, so haven't had to look at blind spots, fears, their inside coding...as the outside world has 'gone their way'. Pain/problems/failure is usually the medicine for self awareness...."

“They tend to focus on the big ideas and less on the process and the needs of others. Self awareness will be low on their radar. But if they discover this to be a weakness in achieving their aims, coaching may become an asset for them.”

“Part of having a focus or a vision requires commitment; for some, this translates to 'being right' or forging their own path, and unless they have some level of self-awareness, seeking support outside of the bubble is difficult to initiate. Additionally, they are more focused on the tasks at hand and often don't take the time to reflect on what sort of leader they are or want to be in that 'disruption.' “

"Personality built around particular experience that may not adapt to reality.”

“They’re coachable in the they are often curious and enjoy being disrupted in themselves. They’re harder to coach when their personality is defensive of what they regard as their exceptional nature and lack humility or have a superhero self regard."

“Messianic belief does not suffer from much doubt. And self-awareness is NOT a characteristic of narcissism.”

“It’s about your age. The younger ones (20s and 30s) may be less self-aware but may actually be coachable. The older ones (40s, 50s) probably know their pros and cons and have mellowed out, adapted their style, protect key people or see the negatives of their impact as being outdated by the need for change. They may be coachable but the worse offenders probably won’t see the point or will revert back to existing behaviour. The others may want coaching but you need to make sure it’s about celebrating and amplifying their ‘pirate’ nature - bearing in mind that a pirate captain is nothing without their loyal and passionate crew!”

“Most leaders are coachable. They just need to make time to listen learn and think. Many know they need to go from A to Z but may need help navigating the path.”

“Awareness: they have to balance minding others feedback whilst following their north star; coachable: if they respect the person, they are usually learners and open minded.”

"In my experience people who are prepared to take risk and be disruptive have to have a certain lack of awareness of themselves and what’s going on around them ( from social /EQ perspective, not necessarily from an understanding the market perspective) in order to drive through the pain of change.”

“Coaching anyone with low self awareness is really tough. They need to understand and see themselves in the context in which they operate and getting them to do that when it’s not obvious to them can be really hard. Often they come across heaps of surprises, and so therefore getting them feedback, and using model such as the Johari window can be really useful.”

"Having worked with a disruptive leader they were both intelligent and persuasive in aligning the team behind their ideas.”

“This was essential for the successful implementation of their concepts. Whilst they were challenging of existing ideas they were supportive of all effort towards the delivery of their vision.”

“In this instance I believe that this leader would have been coachable if they had respect for the experience of the coach as being relevant to their role."

“About self success and ego. Are coachable as they realize this is not a long term strategy.”

“On both counts, total self belief.”

“Blind faith/belief often key to success, but also comes with ego (explicit or implicit).”

“I think it depends! Some are and some aren’t. Lots of them are interested in discovering more about themselves but less willing to do the hard work to change their actions and behavious.”

“They have a vision, often singular, and are driving forward - rarely looking sideways. They believe they are right!”

“Depends on their mindset - growth or not. And female leaders probably more coachable than male. I should have said curiosity as one of the key strengths and anyone who has that should want to be coached.”

“They need to know their advice can force change.”

“I have found that working with disruptive leaders is highly rewarding. It’s key to win trust quickly and not to be afraid to let them know how they are landing at times but to have options, solutions and encouragement for when they get it right and to give feedback on good as well as bad.”

“No one is uncoachable - they simply haven't yet met the right coach yet. Disruptive leaders aren't automatically unself-aware - but perhaps it's a learned (or coached) skill.”

“Disruptive leaders may have already had significant success to date so question why they now need to change. They often are single minded on achieving their goals and issues that arise may be put down to other people than taking responsibility themselves.”

“They are aware of strengths but single minded focus can create a vacuum of no listening. Disruption can take many forms though. I think it’s often misused as blokey exclusionary single mindednesss. But the best are disruptive in their market not in their personality. The former don’t want changing!”

“Ego. And ego! Plus they tend to be running at 100mph all the time which gives lack of time to reflect and no time to stop for coaching.”

“It will depend on the success history. If they have success after sucess, why would they change? But one big failure may change their approach. There is also probably a segment that is very disruptive and methodic which is a sweet spot for a coach.”

“I actually think it's unanswerable! Elon Musk and Thich Nhat Hanh are arguably both disruptive leaders, yet seemingly on opposite ends of the self-awareness (and perhaps coachability) spectrum. One for discussion on a dog walk one day...”

“It is hard to generalise, but in my experience the most effective leaders driving change forward are 'not an island' and can bring teams of capable people together to achieve their collective goal. To do this, they must be self-aware (to plug skill gaps) and open-minded to new and potentially better ideas.”

“As chairman I'm coaching several disruptive leaders, but it requires hard work and high EQ. As long as you are authentic and show a genuine interest in helping them to succeed, you can make substantial progress.”

“Disruptive leaders are usually narcissistic assholes.”

“I think there are many types of disruptive leader, but there are some which I have met that want to be deliberately contrarian, and some which "disrupt with purpose and inclusivity" - at a guess, the contrarian is either probably highly self aware (and doesn't care) or has no self awareness of blind spots. Whereas other leaders might understand their fallibilities and build a team around them which balances out this area of weakness, whilst still retaining a gravitas and permission from the team to lead. There are some high profile disruptive leaders such as Musk, Jobs, Dyson etc which would pride themselves on being uncoachable as "they've been right once by not listening to others, so why should they listen to others to be right in the future!”

“Disruptors tend to have / need a pathologically strong belief and confidence in their own ability and vision - too much self-analysis and self-awareness can get in the way of breaking away from the established way of doing things.”

“In my experience, disruptive leaders have huge intellect, energy, pace and drive. They have personal charisma too. Most are very self aware. I think these leaders are coachable and want to develop....however the consideration becomes how to coach someone who moves a thousand miles an hour and often drives change by sheer force of personality?”

"Not all disruption is good and I have met some very un self-aware leaders who have been very disruptive in a bad way. But they can achieve a mystique of being 'entrepreneurial' nonetheless.”

“Someone said to me that everyone is coachable, they just need the right motivation. Disrupters maybe have a higher level of self-belief and don't feel the need to make themselves vulnerable in the way that decent coaching needs.”